Well, congratulations are in order to our next president, Barack Obama. It's historic!

I can now say I've lived through one of America's greatest tragedies (9/11) and one of America's greatest victories (electing a president not based on color but on qualification).

There has been drama amongst my friends with this election. We would always debate at lunch and in class, but people took something I said and twisted it, making it seem as if I was calling democrats crazy. I wasn't. I have respect for them.

Here's what I said: MSNBC had 74% bad things to say about McCain; only 13% about Obama. CNN spent $1.2 million covering Obama's run while they only spent $200,000 covering McCain's. Fox News only had a $100,000 margin of difference in their spending due to Obama's going across seas, etc. That is fair and balanced. I thought it was crazy how people go to these sources and then vote for Obama.

Was I calling anyone crazy? No. Is Fox News fair and balanced? Yes. Are they biased? Yes. There's a difference though. They may lean toward the right, but at least they give both sides of the story.

As far as questioning those people who voted for Obama based on that information, I cited my uncle. He doesn't have a TV or a computer so the only information he gets is from his neighbors and watching TV with them...in a very pro-Obama neighborhood. It's not right to get one side of the story and then go and vote without hearing both candidates strengths and weaknesses. I think anyone would agree with that.

People have made a huge deal out of what I said, saying they've lost respect for me. Well, I've lost respect for them because they keyed in on only the word crazy.

I'm saddened by what has happened. Rumors were spread about me and thank God I had someone to rely on to stick up for me and tell them it wasn't what I meant. I don't think those relationships will be as strong as they once were.

I can count three people in particular who have hurt me immensely and though I'll still act kind toward them, I can't yet forgive them for being my friend but going behind my back and saying dirty, hurtful, and untrue things about me.

The End.

Today is Election Day!

I'm completely stoked because so far, though it's early, McCain is fairing well. I know he'll win Missouri...my state. If not, I will be so disappointed in my people, hehe.

Anyways, I'm director of our morning show and I actually anchored today for election day. I got in huge trouble because I showed biased opinion toward McCain. In no way did I make rude or offensive comments toward Obama, I simply endorsed McCain.

I was told that I have to make a public apology tomorrow. Blah. Here's what I wrote for it:

CJTV is a nonbiased show and on yesterday's show I clearly displayed a favorable disposition to a candidate. Even though it was only done in humor and in no way did it disrespect any candidate-because I have a deep amount of respect for each-it's still not allowed. Certain rights are taken away from us when we enter school grounds, including freedom of speech. In no way was I trying to influence anyone or offend anyone. Please accept my apology because never again will I apologize for what I believe in.

I was proud of it, because if you have read anything about children's rights in schools, they almost completely disappear. I think I'm a little too self righteous but I don't want to apologize for exercising my voice.

I contacted Bill O'Reilly in reference to my first November 2nd post (elle-bw.livejournal.com/9490.html). I'm praying he'll first get it, then read at least the key element on air.

The American people need to hear this!!!

...I'm still not done ranting...bear with me, please.

For Halloween I dressed up as Sarah Palin. I went around my school while everyone else was trick or treating from classroom to classroom and campaigned for a McCain victory by targeting those that could vote.

Here's a picture of me dressed up as her. I quite love it. (:

I'm going to start with the good news otherwise I'll go off on a tangent and completely forget to tell everyone the only piece of information that is making me happy these days: I got a job!!!

I know, I know. It doesn't sound thrilling but I work at Barnes and Noble and get amazing discounts and opportunities so I'm extremely happy. I already love it there.

It was built back in 2006 so this past June marked its two year anniversary so it's still new and amazingly kept. Talbot's, White and Black, Chico's, and Bread Co. are all in the same plaza and one minute away is Chesterfield Mall which was just newly remodeled a few years ago as well so it's amazing.

That was short and sweet but now onto the bad news...

Barack Obama is going to win the title of the next president of the United States. I'm a senior right now so I'm considering moving out of the country for college.

First off, I'm not a crazy radical but I do believe Obama's time is not now. I think in another four or eight years he'd make a great president but not for 2008. Let me tell you why.

The founders of the Constitution believed in what we call a system of checks and balances, meaning no one authority would have extreme power like a dictatorship or the monarchy they extracted themselves from.

The United States has three branches: the executive (president, his cabinet, EOC, etc.), the legislative (Congress, divided into the House of Representatives with 435 members of which are constantly being redistributed every ten years according to a state's increase or decrease in population, and the Senate with a total of 100 members, two from each state), and the judiciary (which we most notably know of as the Supreme Court but there is an entire pipe line of courts including district courts, etc.).

The purpose of each branch is to "check" the other one, making sure it has no more power than the next. A common misconception when voters here president's speeches, is that the president can actually do those things. Not true! Without the approval of Congress, the president has very limited rights, and even those rights are often scrutinized and called upon by Congress and the Supreme Court (i.e. declaring war, like President Bush did without the approval of Congress).

Here's where we run into the problem, though. When (not if) Obama becomes president, the executive branch will be liberal. Now, Representatives run every two years and Senators every six years (but only 1/3 run every six years because of the cycle, meaning every two years, there will be some Senators running for reelection as an incumbent). We're expecting the Senate to have no less than 55 democrats elected, more likely 60, causing the Senate to have a majority of liberals. Same idea with the House.

When we have a Congressional majority of liberals, that allows more leeway for the president if he is a liberal, too, because it makes it much easier for a bill to get passed (after it makes it through committee, etc.).

Now all that is left is the judiciary branch. Judges are always nonpartisan, however they are selected in a partisan format. For example, Justice Antonin Scalia (a controversial and right-winged Supreme Court judge) was nominated for his position based on his beliefs. So a president choose a judge based on his beliefs.

With two positions open on supreme courts, with two Bush nominees not being passed by Congress, it is more likely than not that those need-to-be-filled-positions will roll over into Obama's presidency.

Then we have four other judges who were elected by Reagan and Clinton expected to retire when Obama becomes president, allowing for Obama to choose those four appointees as well. And with a majority of democrats in Congress, all six suggestions are more likely to pass.

That leaves America with a liberal executive, legislative, and judiciary branch. When each branch is almost in accordance with the other, where are the checks and balances? They begin to cease to exist. This is not good for our nation!

For those who believe in pro-life or an other Supreme Court controversial issue, it's most likely going to swing to the left because the entire court system will be shifted.

People, please listen to what I'm saying. Even if you don't like John McCain and Sarah Palin, America thrives on checks and balances...it's how the founders hoped to keep America functioning. When there is no tension in Washington, and everything goes smoothly, it's actually a bad thing...trust me on this. There needs to be conflict in order for their to be success.

Save me from having to live through four years (oh, God, please no more) of an Obama administration.

And if you have anything to say on this, please be respectful. I honestly don't care if you disagree with me...I actually enjoy debates, but let's do so under friendly terms, eh?

This idea seems to be going around and I found it an interesting way for you to find out more about me and for me to find out more about you possibly.

The problem with LJ: we all think we are so close, but really, we know nothing about each other. So I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me. Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about. Ask away.

Then post this in your LJ and find out what people don't know about you.

That's what has been floating around and I'm actually open to all sorts of questions...personal, casual, anything. Don't be afraid to ask and I promise to answer. (:

It's been awhile. But I do have excuses...of course! I went on Kairos with a third of my senior class. It was amazing! I feel renewed mentally and spiritually as well as physically and I can't wait to go back to therapy with this new found knowledge and attitude.

In other news, though, I'm thinking of once again deleting the story I've started and rewriting it with a slightly different plot. Pretending to Breathe just isn't in my interest right now, especially since I have worked so hard to overcome the truth of emotions that exist in that story. Maybe some other time I will revisit it.

Hopefully I can post my new story soon...only time will tell.

Well since I live in the great city of St. Louis (blah) I was here for the VP debate! I went down to SLU and got to watch it with a ton of other McCain/Palin supporters and then Sarah Palin herself came down.

It was so amazing watching the debate and then having her arrive by bus to deafening cheers. She is truly my hero!!!

Anyways, did anyone else watch the debate? Oh I have so many stories to tell!!! Who do you think won? I think Sarah Palin...woot, woot!

The debate is on and I couldn't be happier. It was noble of McCain and Obama to step away from the campaign to go to Congress and try and figure something out for this economical crisis. After all, the Republicans were looking at McCain as the pivotal candidate; the person who would decide yes or no. And in reality neither one is president; their jobs are as senators...it's what they're being paid to do!

Nevertheless we get to see how everything turns out tonight at 8 and I don't think I've been happier, LOL! I adore politics with a fiery passion and I plan on staying home and watching it with my sweet baby boy, Ty. (He's a dog but really, he's just a big baby.)






Isn't he adorable? (: Anyways, watch it and let me know your thoughts! And I would love to know everyones view point and where they stand.

Chapter 1 has finally been posted! ...And I'm not in love with it. I feel like it should have been longer and this whole long list of things. It's depressing really that after one chapter I'm ready to throw in the towel. But I have so much planned for the story so we shall see.

I've written about six pages of chapter 1 for my new story on fictionpress, Pretending to Breathe and I'm not at all in love with it. Arg.

I hope to have it up sometimes soon though so watch out for it!

Extreme Home Makeover recently came to St. Louis and my yearbook class and CJTV crew got to go on the demolition day. It was amazing!!! To see a house that took months to build being destroyed in a matter of minutes and then rebuilt in 105 hours; pure magic and absolutely inspiring.

I got to see the whole design crew and even Ty Pennington. It was pretty cool even though I'm not all for the celebrity scene. I just liked seeing someone who is a TV personality up close and personal; there was a sort of aura to it.

Anyways, while I was there I TV crew interviewed me and as vain as it sounds, it was way cool to see myself on TV. I'm on around the 2:30 mark.



Enjoyed it?! Let me know how I did!!!

On Monday I will be starting my third week of school. And already I've felt the pressure. So much to do it's almost painful. And on top of that I still have therapy to go to twice a week and all the medicine that makes me so tired. I come home and go to sleep at 4 pm and then wake up at 5 am to start my day over. It's exhausting. I've gotten blood work done, and numerous other tests but no one can figure out what is going on. Ugh.

So to balance everything tomorrow my school's academic council is meeting to approve a course for me, entitled Independent Study in Journalism and then I'll actually get credit for the hours of work I put into doing the school yearbook, newspaper, and a magazine. That way I can actually add on another study so that I have one every day and then only three classes a day. Sigh. Hopefully I'll actually be able to get things done!

Wish me luck on all the homework I have to do today...five papers, plenty of reading, etc. Ugh.

Oh, anyone watch the DNC and RNC? Ah...drama and love. (: What are your thoughts?

Instructions:

Take a photo of your bookshelf. Post it on your LiveJournal and explain how it is arranged. Then...

x. List your top ten books (of the ones that you own).
x. List your three least favorite books (of the ones that you own). And why.
x. How many books are on your shelf that you haven't read?
x. Also, if there are other things on your shelf besides books, explain their significance.
x. Tag five others whose bookshelves you'd like to see.













So those are my lovely little shelves. The first one is two pink shelves organized by author and group. Then one of my desk's (white one) has it grouped by author as well and when I get down to the very bottom shelf, it contains reference material, school books that I had to keep and is organized by genre.

After that we have my dresser with my TV and limited movies (I don't like very many). And inside it I have more and more books...I really need to get another bookshelf. Then my other desk contains the pile of books that I am currently reading (five or so) so that means I have not read them.

I have another large bookshelf and more books that don't fit on it but I don't have pictures of those. There are books under my bed, books I bought online that haven't arrived, and even electronic books.

To sum it up, I'm a book whore.

Now, it is time for top ten, and sadly I cannot say. I adore reading and read almost a book a day so I like a lot of books, all for different reasons.

I will say my three least favorite books would be the Private series (which has just gotten worse and it goes along), Breaking Dawn (eh, it was okay) and a book I read by Carol Higgins Clark...can't remember the name. I love Mary, but Carol...no thanks!

Other things that are on my shelves are my MacBook, my iPhone, gifts from Hawaii, Florida, and Mexico, as well as organization tools.

Hmmm...whose bookshelf would I like to see? How 'bout it preludity, mandywriter, writergrl, and... regattabay.

Orientation was yesterday. In other words, I finally met hell.

It's not that I'm not looking forward to going back to school. There is some sort of excitement that springs up within me. It's more the fact that I know the excitement will wear off after...two days or so? Two days! And then I have over one hundred and fifty more to go. The homework can become tedious, even busy work. And, my grade school was so preparatory that I have yet to learn something new in high school...and I'm going to be a senior...and this is a private, college preparatory school. That's just sad.

But since it is my senior year I am hoping for the best. Keep up my 4.1 gpa, still rock strong as being editor of the school newspaper and yearbook...still enjoy being director of the morning show and working in National Honor Society and Principal's Council. There's a buzz to being with old friends again that I haven't felt for awhile.

After I was diagnosed I was pretty much a recluse, hiding in bed all day, sleeping. But now I feel a love for life again and hope to rejoin it 150%. I think I might be asking for a lot, but if I give a lot into it, then maybe the outcome will be as I expect.

Anyways, today I went up to school and organized my locker and dropped off my senior quilt square which I designed...wickedly adorable. Now all that's left is to finish up my religion work for today, do all of math tomorrow, which will be dreadful, and then somehow do summer reading before school starts on Monday.

Wow, that's a hell of a lot. Off to make a deal with the devil...

I'm about to go take my sister to her training session. Yes, she's fourteen and she has a personal trainer and nutritionist. Blah. I tried one and it didn't go too well. But my sister wants to go into fitness when she gets older and I have no doubt she will be successful. I mean she's fourteen and she has a kick ass body. Jealous!!!

Anyways, ironically enough, after I drop her off, I'm heading to the place across the street to go pick me up some unhealthy grub. Yum, yum.

Then I'll come home and hopefully finish doing my religion senior service. Talk about a pain in the ass! Four different papers varying in length from two pages to four pages and then four one page journal entries. That's all due before school, then when school starts we have to do a lovely presentation. Please, let me transfer!

Saturday maybe I'll get the chance to actually START my math packet which needs to be finished by that Monday. Oh, and for the summer reading...yeah, haven't started that either. Need to, plan to, but don't want to.

Such is the life of a girl who goes to a gay ass all-girl's college preparatory high school.

Can I just say one thing? SUCK IT!

*end rant*

I got a Twitter account! I'm still trying to figure out the logistics of it, but I'm excited!!! I'm really liking this whole being connected and meeting new people through the web thing. It's exciting and liberating all at once.

But like I said, I am careful to keep my identity a secret for fear that my creative freedom will be taken away. I have taken all issues into account so hopefully that is all settled now. (;

Two nights ago I saw The Dark Night. Um...wow. I don't know if there are words in the English language sufficient enough. Sure, it was long as hell, but I'd be damned if I noticed. It was purely amazing. I was like 'It's over? Why?' This wasn't one of those movies you go and see for mindless entertainment. It was hauntingly disturbing with such true messages. Fabulous job!

School starts for me in about a week. I'm scared...still hoping to convince my mom to let me home school. I'm going through a difficult time in my life right now and therapy and medication are helping but I really need to be able to sleep when I'm exhausted and do work around my schedule. I only hope she won't let the ghost of college applications overshadow my need to get better.

Oh, and my Twitter account is bwellebw so go and check me out!!!

For awhile there I was getting really good at updating regularly and now I'm at a stand still. I seem to only update because I feel like I literally have to. But I don't want to feel that way. I think it's because to me, this journal is supposed to be anonymous and people have found out who I actually am.

I just want to be able to write my actual thoughts and feelings without having to worry about someone thinking I've gone into some mad depression.

Someone who has been helping me recently told me that reading and writing were my creative outlets, something I had always known. But then she went on to tell me how I knew using my imagination was the one place I would not or could not be judged. If I kept what I wrote to myself, I had a certain liberation and freedom. But now that some people know, I feel like I'm writing a censored work, afraid some government official will find it.

So now, this is the real me and I will undergo some changes to ensure I have complete anonymity. I'm just not ready for the world to know who I am...I'm very private and until I feel like I have a real and developed gift, I just want to keep my life, my life.

I'm sitting down right now with gum glued to my lips. The sticky substance seems to have found a liking for the outside of my mouth rather than the inside. It's a fruitless effort on my part, trying to get the purply-pink Extra gum off.

Not too much has happened on the development front. I'm as exhausted as ever and have way too much to do I think I might explode or even risk getting expelled if I could just hire someone to do it all.

I go to the doctor's two time a week now and I'll be getting some blood work done to see if that leads us anywhere on the development front. Unfortunately for me, beside my life/death illness, I've caught a bout of a cold, my throat becoming scratchy and soar and the water supplies running low in our city for how much I've been in-taking.

Either way, I've wanted to get something accomplished today so I'm going to try and see how getting a chapter out for one of my fanfiction stories works out.

So...I've been gone a long time. Thought it was about time I should answer the question 'Where in the World is Elle?'

Last time we left off, I talked about family being in town and they just left yesterday! It was a whirlwind of festivities and parties that left me exhausted and I wasn't even there half of the time! Instead, I was off taking an essay writing class just so I could keep myself a notch ahead with college applications. (; Phew, can't wait until that is over.

Then on Sunday, my mom and I (or should I stick flashing lights around 'I') drove to Chicago...five hours...in a car...with NO music or sound because my princess of a mother HAD to read. LOL! She truly has come a long way from being an instruction manual girl to loving the Twilight Saga that she finished all four books in one week and is starting over to read them all again!

Nevertheless, it was amazing! I visited three colleges up there: Lake Forest College (small, private, liberal arts college that I adored and it was in an absolutely gorgeous town with Lake Michigan in walking distance...beautiful!), Northwestern (nah, not for me!), and Loyola (private, Jesuit education right along the shores of Lake Michigan with A TON of alterations and buildings being strewn up so it is one fanciful place). Overall, it has left me with a tough decision: small college in an absolutely gorgeous setting or a medium-large college near a not-so nice neighborhood...

While I pondered away in contemplation, my mom and I went to see Stephenie Meyer!!! Took us two hours to get those damn tickets and it was worth every second! Justen was amazing as well and I have practically downloaded all of Blue October's songs now. Although, he played them acoustically and the band is more rock...either way, amazing!

I did get sick while we were waiting in line to get our books signed...it was bad, of course. I was shaking and couldn't drink or eat anything though I desperately needed to. No one had food and the concession stand was closed so I had to sit and wait on a bench outside the theatre. We ended up being second to last to get our books signed and I had trouble walking up the stairs to get to her. I was shaking all the way down the streets, hanging on to my mom so she could help drag me along. Finally, we were able to stop and get some protein in me to help raise my blood sugar and then we went back to our hotel on Michigan Avenue and slept.

Overall, it was amazing. Being so exhausted and sick all the time prevented us from doing everything I wanted to but in the end we were both happy campers...until I drove the whole five hours home...again!